Arranged Marriage

Marriage Season is going on...and i too have been hearing a lot of marriage talks...not mine..but of my friends etc. On one hand, there are people whose family have already started looking....and then there are people..already in relationships...and breaking off just because the family wont accept it.

I have already seen at least 4 of friends breaking off their 4 yr relationships because of this. And this made me ponder...why and what this fuss is all about?!!!
Oxford defines marriage as "The legal union of a man and woman as husband and wife, and in some jurisdictions, between two persons of the same sex, usually entailing legal obligations of each person to the other."

Now lets leave the same sex part, and concentrate on the rest of the sentence. Keep it in mind.
Arranged marriag(AM’s for short)e is a marriage arranged by someone other than the couple getting wedded, curtailing or avoiding the process of dating before marriage. The match could be selected by parents, a matchmaking agent, matrimonial site etc etc. In many communities, priests or religious leaders as well as relatives or family friends play a major role in matchmaking.
Now let’s see the process of matchmaking.
Steps:
1. Girl/Boy sends picture
2. Boy/Girl sees the other picture
3. Boy/Girl selects the ones who they think are good looking (decisions are based on variety of factors…the image of self also matters)
4. Girl/Boy receives acceptance offers.
5. Girl/Boy chooses some of the offers.
6. Contact is made.
7. Meeting is scheduled
8. In the meeting, parents(sometimes the people themselves) inquire about the qualities and others attributes of each other in the meeting.
9. A decision is made, Marriage takes place and the couple live together for the entire lives.

Arranged Marriages aren’t exactly the same, but then it somehow revolves around the steps mentioned above. Just maybe it’s a bit modernised about how it goes about now.

Now, thinking over this process, I cant help but remember one very important stage of my college life. This stage was probably making my professional life begin on a smooth and healthier note.

Now, if anyone reading this is or was an engineer, you would know what the final yr beckons. Placements. Now the placement process is one in which you get placed in a industry/company. Here’s how the general process goes about:
Steps:
1. Company sends in resume ( its details, package, profile)
2. Girl/Boy selects company to appear and sends resume (in some cases, make the initial cut off criteria)
3. Company reads the resume (accepts people above cut off criteria)
4. Company selects the ones who they think are good enough (decisions are based on variety of factors initially… like aptitude tests, GD)
5. Contact is made, meeting is scheduled (Personal Interview)
6. In the meeting, company(sometimes the interviewee themselves) inquire about the qualities and others attributes of the person they are meeting.
7. A decision is made, Appointment takes place and the employee is employed in the company for a minimum of some bond period (Bond period is the one in which a employee is not allowed to leave the company without paying adequate compensation)

All placements aren’t exactly the same, but then it somehow revolves around the steps mentioned above.


Strikingly similar situations aint it???? Marriage just makes you go into a bond for life. All the decisions are based on your RESUME…the prime deciding factor.
All I could say was …. W-T-F !!!!
In an AM, it doesn’t matter, in most cases, how the person is, how he treats you, how nice he is, is he/she worth existing together… how he/she behaves, his smartness…etc etc etc… All that matters is “How good looking he/she is”, “How much is he earning”! “Is the caste/religion/language meeting the requirements”

In other words, its just a compromise. Compromise with your life. You just live on because it’s another responsibility on you head now, and responsibility you would have rather taken with someone else. Compromise, Sacrifice and Concede.

It just the same...u accept an offer from a Non-dream(engineers would understand)company just because Yahoo or Microsoft (Super Dream) didnt find you GOOD enough for them. And with time and the responsibility given to you, you start doing ur JOB...

Just ask yourself that how can you marry somebody you don't know. Knowing somebody before marriage allows partners to have better respect and understanding for each other's needs and desires. This way they are better adjusted in the marriage when they finally take their wedding vows. But here, the need is money and desire is a good looking spouse you can show off to your friends and companions.

On a personal note now, I shun this type. A vow taken sometime earlier and reiterated every time this topic comes about…. I think I am strong enough to live my life without a spouse..i have been doing it for the past 23 yrs..why not another 23??
Its gonna hurt at first,,but then I’ll get used to it as well….M Never ever gonna go for arranged marriage….if love is something I’ll ever find, I’ll consider myself blessed. Else, hard luck mate :)

To all the readers, ur comments are welcome. But plz dont come about saying this is how the society works n all...I dont fear the society..Doing what my heart feels is right is more important than doing what others feel is correct!